Life is full of beautiful coincidence.
In 2003 I was sitting in a small waiting lounge in Frankfurt airport waiting to board a flight to Milan, Italy. I was travelling with a few dozen rowers as part of the Canadian National Team. I was in that no-sleep stupor you get from an overnight Trans-Atlantic flight in economy when you’re 6 feet tall and seated with others of the same height and width. We’d flown Toronto to London and then over to Frankfurt for the last leg. I was itching for a real bed and some deep sleep.
A guy about my age approached the gate waiting area looking nervously at his ticket and the gate number. He finally took a seat right across from me still looking shaky and sweaty. He looked familar to me. I stared at him for a bit but he was too agitated to make eye contact with anything. Finally it hit me: we’d gone to highschool together.
Half-way around the world and I run into someone I sat next to in grade 11 Math.
We caught up while waiting for the flight. He was on his first trip working for a youth aid NGO and had never been outside of Canada until that trip. A few minutes of “what are they doing now” talk about highschool classmates and he visibly relaxed.
You expect that with a move like this, to somewhere fairly remote, that you will arrive connection-less. But Chris and I went out for dinner with another family our first weekend here and not only are they from the Vancouver area, but Chris and his co-worker’s wife went to the same highschool. It was great to dicuss the ins and outs of making a move like this with another family. And, of course, I was particularly interested to hear about their approach to their belongings, what they sold and what they shipped. They decided to ship their furniture (they’re renting an unfurnished house) but loaned or stored big electronics like TVs and a Vita Mix blender.
It’s hard to part with expensive good condition electronics and housewares that you use a lot. As you can see from our boxes above I just couldn’t get rid of the Kitchen Aid mixer. Despite two offers to buy it, it stayed in our storage pile. I’ve used it a lot, the resale value on it will be a fraction of what it would cost me to replace and… drum rolll… we have free storage.
My mother-in-law was kind enough to offer up space for us to store some things while we’re living in the UK. The bulk of what we kept are small appliances. Oh, and my collection of Christmas decorations (all purchased post-Christmas for big savings).
In storage:
- Small appliances: Kitchen Aid mixer, Cuisinart, Nespresso machine and milk frother, slow cooker.
- Mementos: small box of rowing medals, Chris’s coin collection from his youth, my National Team racing suit.
- Frames: NCAA champ framed photo, framed Bachelor’s degree.
- Dishware: small and large size nesting bowls (medium one was sent over by freight), 8 Pottery Barn appetizer plates, 2 Pottery Barn serving plates, wedding china set.
- Band memorabilia: half dozen t-shirts, posters, stickers from Chris’s band.
- Glassware: 8 wine glasses, 4 champagne flutes, 2 ice wine glasses.
Will I want all this stuff in five years? Should I have sold it all? If it was wanted enough to store, shouldn’t I have sent it over to use here?
Good questions.
Time will tell and I’m not afraid to revisit ownership of these items. We’ll be back in Vancouver twice a year should I want to unload any of them.
What about you? Anything in a storage locker or closet that isn’t seeing use but you’re adamant about keeping?
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This is very interesting to me. When I left for the military 7 years ago, I had one small duffle bag with a change of clothes and some hygiene items. After bootcamp, I had a large duffle for all uniforma items, a small carry on for civilian attire and a backback for bathroom, personal items. I received a call from my mom wanting to know what she was to do with my stuff. They were moving and she wanted it gone. I was not able to get home until 15 months later, due to training and deployment. My mom reluctantley moved the stuff, even after I told her to just donate it all. I went home, loaded up a moving truck, drove it 50 miles from my parents home and donated it all. I did look through those boxes and in that short amount of time realized I wasn’t that person anymore nor would I need any of it. : ) I should have just donated it from the get go. I think time will tell for you. Good luck.
I just used a photo scanning service. Well worth the price. Spent two afternoons scanning and was getting no where with the pile of photos. Cost was $135 CDN (roughly 80 pounds) for up to 1200 photos.
I have a box of fragile stuff that I will probably never display again as I have discovered that I HATE dusting it. But all of it is sentimental, and it’s a relatively small box.
I have a couple of boxes of photos and memorabilia that need to be scrapbooked, but I don’t have a place to work on it right now, so for now I just scowl at those boxes every time I pass them. Since it is a constant source of frustration: I pass those silly boxes at least 2x a day, I’ve considered just throwing it all away, but I’m sure I would regret that later when my son is older and asking to see pictures of my dad (who is no longer with us.)
I did donate an electric carving knife that I had for 11 years, it was in its original box and had never been used or even opened…and yet it was a terribly difficult decision to let that thing go. Why??? I have no idea. I have not missed it one bit since I let it go a few months ago.
I’ve seen a lot of electric carving knives in peoples homes but only ever seen them used twice a year: Thanksgiving and Christmas. I do wonder, are they that much better than a really sharp knife? I have a knife sharpener and it, along with my knives and chopping board, are the most used things in my kitchen.
Congrats on letting go of it =)
I’m so glad to have found your website. It looks like we’ll be leaving Vancouver for a 3-year posting in Istanbul at the end of the summer. I’ve been speading a lot of time thinking about all the stuff we need to deal with, and I’m coming to realize that this is a golden opportunity to simplify. Thanks for sharing details of your move – it make me feel like this process will be managable.
Istanbul! Wow! That’s exciting. And yes, a big move is a great opportunity to pare down belongings. We did a huge round in the fall and I was still surprised at how much we gave away before moving over here.
Good luck and keep me posted on how it goes.
Love your website. I am on my own decluttering journey, living in a smaller space. I have a punch bowl set that I’ve never used, but I’m afraid I’ll need it one day. I do use my good dishes to make meals special though.
Ahh the fear of the one day. I have it too on a few items. Right now it’s a fear of we’ll move back to Canada earlier than we think and have to buy new stuff. I feel your pain.
One thing that helped me justify keeping a few things was loaning them out. If someone needed a cake pan, etc I would gladly hand it over.
Last time we moved I stored some stuff at my father in laws, old photos from high school, yearbooks and other stuff that does not get used regularly (honestly it was 1 box) – a year later I had forgotten about it and before asking me, he threw it in the garbage. I know that I should let it go, but it honestly burns me every time I think about it….
Now that we are moving again – we will not be storing anything, only taking what we can and getting rid of the extra. But I am not moving across the ocean or my thoughts would be different.
That’s tough. I have 4 high school year books stored in one of those boxes. The only reason I wouldn’t be too burned if they were tossed is that my twin has the same yearbooks. Hmmm… maybe that means I can get rid of mine.
I love your attitude and honesty to this process (moving an’ all). I wonder if having weaknesses (for china or books) makes it un-minimal in any way. Whatever we call it the main idea remains to live with less and enjoy. That is the key for me, I still find so many of my belongings are not enjoyed – if I don’t love it now, will I love it later? Although I agree, replacement cost is a factor too. We have the second baby on the way and am glad I have kept a few pieces of maternity clothes.
Oh and I almost forgot, when #2 turns one year old, we are planning to move bac to Europe as well!
Thanks for the kind words, Charlotte. I’m a moderate minimalist so I don’t have goals of getting down to a set number of things. But I can see how wedding china is far from minimalist. My crusade against stuff is still a work in progress.
Completely agree with your sentiment about if you don’t love it now, will you love it later. Some areas are easy for me – clothing! – others are more difficult – housewares!
Congratulations on baby #2 =)
Great social life already! …next is to find a good babysitter, and you’re sorted! :)))
I say, don’t worry about the stuff you left behind. If you really need them, they’ll find your way back to you. If not, by then you’ll feel lightened by getting rid of them.
Thanks, Laura. And yes, finding a babysitter is on my list for June. I want to go on a date and not have to wipe a nose or pick up food off the ground.
No storage locker here, and I’m pretty adamant about using what we have or it goes. However (here it comes), I was just given a complete set of 30 year old Royal Doulton china (BRAND NEW!) from my grannie and we have yet to use it. I have no idea what to do with it, it’s not my style but I’m a bit reluctant to part with it yet. Oh well. Other than that, everything is getting used except for the handful of photo albums we have which we tend to only look at about once a year. Continuing to pare down and just unloaded our slow cooker this past month, and feeling no pain on that one. 🙂
Would your Grannie be crushed if you sold it? Obviously from my list above I also have some reservations about getting rid of things.
PS. Again, go Canucks! Must have been crazy down there last night. I was up at 4am (thanks Henry) and Chris got up to check the score. Yeah!!
I moved out of my house a few years ago when I left my ex-husband. There are some things that I have missed often since then (mostly CDs). His widow, however, recently found 5 shoe boxes full of photographs I had totally forgot even existed! So I find I’m torn… if I hadn’t thought of them even once in 3 years… how important are they?
I envy you having photos scanned for you. That is not in my budget and I don’t have a scanner. I will likely continue to store photos for-flippin’-ever.
Any chance there is a scanner at your local library? The other thing you can do is take pictures of the pictures if you have a digital camera. Isn’t great for quality but could help you thin down your collection.
Isn’t it crazy how you run into people like that? I was in Munich, walking down the street and literally bumped into a highschool classmate. Nuts!
But on another note – I want everyone to start using their wedding china!! Pretty things are meant to be enjoyed. I whipped ours out to serve my husband’s birthday dinner on it, even though it was only spaghetti 🙂
Love it. Something very special about running into someone from home when you’re abroad. Makes the world seem small.
And I agree, wedding china needs to be used. Makes an everyday meal feel special.
I recently got rid of the bowls we used in our wedding spread. I wasnt using them and they took up sooo much space. Now, instead of my wedding memories being dominated and triggered by the presence of these bowls, I can look to other wedding memories beyond these bowls!…. and better enjoy my marriage and life now that I dont have to worry about housing these things we dont use. 🙂
Good luck with your new journey!
Totally agree! You can spend so much time thinking about the memories that you associate with “stuff”, that you lose sight of what is really important – the people in your life and enjoying life with them right now.
I was going to say no, since everything we own is in our house, but then it occurred to me that we have a bunch of stuff in boxes in the crawl space under our house.
It includes Christmas decorations, baby gear and clothing that I don’t want to get rid of until I’m sure I’m done procreating, our fans (they’ll come out soon), and a bunch of stuff I probably should get rid of.
It’s awfully easy, when you have the space, to just stash stuff and never look at it again. I should probably go down and do some clearing out, honestly.
Sent some maternity clothes and infant clothing in our freight shipment. Probably a quarter of what I originally owned but damn, it you have to rebuy that stuff it’s expensive.
I agree, if we had a big house I know I would have had a room that was just stuff I wasn’t sure what to do with. Living in smaller spaces helps with that.
PS. Go Canucks!
I have antiques, pictures (by the trunk load), memorabilia (also by the trunk load) and old furniture from my grandparents that I feel obligated to keep. I doubt my grandparents would care, but I can’t let these things go.
We had similar issues but with the expectations we would keep it… alone out of 7 cousins… because we bought their house. After grandma & granddad passed away, we decided that if no one else felt a strong enough attachment to take the furniture/memorabilia (or ask us to keep it until they could take it), we had no obligation to keep anything that didn’t work for us… but it took me a while to get there. Many, many carloads to Goodwill and craigslist posting later we got down to a few pieces of furniture, some household goods, and a box of antique books.
I think the ONLY things that are obligatory is to make sure photos have a good home (not necessarily yours) and nothing of value gets trashed (sold, given away, whatever, just not chuck it).
I love your blog and my family and I are working on getting rid of all of the extra crap in our lives! We sold some gold and silver yesterday and our HUGE garage sale is set for the end of the month. I noticed that you kept your wedding china, do you use it? We have used ours maybe 5 times in 11 years and I want to get rid of it. I am currently waiting on a quote from an online replacement co. I know I will not get much for it but it kills me that is is all sitting in a cabinet taking up space! Any thoughts?
I’ve used my wedding china three times. Embarrassing, I know. But I just couldn’t part with it. I think getting rid of things can be a process and some day, if it still isn’t a part of our lifestyle, I’m sure I will get rid of it. Just not today.
Keep me posted on what your quote is. I know mine was discontinued when Royal Doulton went under a while back. It’s a Vera Wang pattern. Lovely. And lovely to look at in my cupboards because I never use it =(
Will you be there for 5 years? I didn’t remember hearing how long it would be. I’ve lived within a 30 mile radius for the past 29 years, so we haven’t had such extreme motivation to clear out as you (though I’m working on it!) But, my parents are missionaries in Africa. They have been through all these thoughts and have done a lot of purging! Between making such choices and then seeing how many Africans live, my parents are such contented people and able to live with little or much. This might be a life changing move for you! I am eager to hear more about life there and hopefully see some pictures!
We’re thinking 3-5 years. I have a feeling that if it is going well we’ll reconsider things when Henry is school age (3 years from now).
Great that you have such close role models with your parents. Not only for the living simply but with their dedication and service to others.
Pictures coming. Maybe even a little video.
I have four (large) boxes at my parents. Slowly, each trip home, I get rid of some and/or move it over (I live in the UK as well).
This next trip I’ll be getting rid of everything except one box which will live there permanently with things I use on trips over.
Have a feeling we’ll be doing something similar. Just couldn’t part with this stuff right now. It’s a process!
Definitely a process for sure!